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أثر الخطبة والعدول عنها وتأثيرها على ما دفع من مهر وهدايا

ان الخطبة هي وعد بالزواج وكونها وعداً فيجوز العدول عنها، وان كان من مكارم الاخلاق ان لا يكون العدول بغير سبب لان الوفاء بالوعد هو الاصل، وقد يسبب العدول متاعب للخاطبين او احدهما.

قد يحصل ان يقدم الخاطب المهر كله او جزء منه خلال فتره الخطبة، وقد يقوم بتقديم بعض الهدايا مجامله لمن ستكون شريكه عمره فما مصير المهر والهدايا هل يسترجعهما الخاطب ام لا….؟
ج: الذي عليه العلماء ان ما دفع من مهر يسترد بعينه ان كان قائما او بقيمته ان هلك او استهلك لأنه مال مدفوع لغاية الزواج ولم يتم، كما ذهب بعض العلماء الى ان المخطوبه اذا تصرفت بالشراء بتسليط من الخاطب فانها تُخير برد المهر او ماقامت بشرائه، وان تصرفت من تلقاء نفسها فإن الخاطب هو الذي يُخير.
وأما ما يتعلق بالهدايا المقدمه من قبل الخاطب فان المخطوبه تقوم بردها ان كان العدول من جانبها ولا ترده اذا كان العدول من جانب الخاطب وهذا ما عليه المذهب الحنبلي والمالكيه يرون كذلك الا اذا كان هناك عرف بذلك فانه يؤخذ به او شرط متفق عليه سابقا لان المعروف عليه عرفا كالمشروط شرطاً فالعرف محكم والشرط ألزم.

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